Divorce is the Best Thing I Ever Did!

Not to be facetious, and not to take it lightly, first let me say, divorce was the HARDEST thing I ever did!  So, if you are going through divorce, or any big life change, I get it.  You don’t know if you can do it.  You feel like a turtle trying to crawl out of the muck onto dry land.   Make no mistake, it’s hard, no matter what the circumstance.  And I tried to make that marriage work, kind of like “The Little Engine That Could”…twenty-five years worth of chugging uphill!

Well, the engine ran out of steam.   I ran out of fuel.  But I started filling myself up with a different kind of fuel…soul fuel.  I had no where else to turn, so I prayed for myself, but also for him and I handed it all over to the big guy (or woman) in the sky…or the big universe…whatever works for you.  See, first of all, I was raised to think that God was a male.  So I viewed him like a CEO.  You call on him, leave a message, and he may get back to you and he may not!

But this time, I prayed  in ways I had never done.  I handed it over.  I said, “You take care of both of us because this is too big for me.”  And I did it with compassion. I mean, this was an “on my knees” moment…total surrender.  And what a surprise!  Spirit landed on my shoulders.  I could feel it.  I could feel angels (and I love angels).  And I had a genius spiritual buddy in my friend, Carrie.  Then miracles showed up, I mean, little ones and big ones!

Of course, I had to notice them.  That’s the thing with miracles.  You put the intention out there, the prayer, but then you have to look for the signs.  And sometimes, they’re pretty small, like you open a book and it has just the message that you needed to hear.

With me, they are often funny.  One day, I stopped at a postal store to fax yet another legal document to my lawyer.  I was sad at this ending, I was scared, I felt weighted down, and I was not laughing.  As I dejectedly exited the store, a song came through the sound system, a disco song I hadn’t heard in years…“I Will Survive”!

Well, I heard it and got the joke, and I laughed out loud as I quietly boogied to my car.  And I have to tell you, that song played several times over the next months.  I have disco angels, what can I say?

And of course, the miracles got bigger over time, including this amazing life and living my dreams in New York City, all of which has taken years off my life.  And I share these tips with you.  They were so essential.

  • Give yourself permission to take time for YOUR needs. Like the turtle,
    take it slow!
  • Make self-care a priority! (Take walks, sleep, read inspirational books).
  • Surround yourself with people who support you.



bio2Karen Fitzgerald is a personal development coach and entrepreneur whose mission is to help guide top performing creative women make big changes in their life.  She is also a sought after public speaker, writer and performer and has written for the Huffington Post and has spoken at Hay House.


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2 Responses to “Divorce is the Best Thing I Ever Did!”
  1. Liz says:

    Loved this Karen …. I felt much of the same … the sadness of something that started out with such hope to be ending in such a horrible way …. and then the roller coaster of the next couple of years …. and now the lightness – and yes even feeling younger (as long as i don’t look in the mirror) … so glad to hear that you are living the life of your dreams …. hugs to you …

  2. Kathy Kuhn says:

    You have such a gift!! I am so proud of you. I can’t wait until I hear you sing that song again…the passion you give it is very moving AND you are proving daily that you will survive!! Love you

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