What Do You Want? (Part 2)



As the story left off, I was beginning my whole new life NYC.  Before we skip to the end, there’s a whole lot of “how” in how I got there.

In 2001, as I was struggling through my very lonely marriage, I was advised to journal everyday.  Well, I would try it for awhile, but then I only really wrote when it was so bad I couldn’t stand it anymore.

After some time, if you read it, you would think I was ready to jump off a bridge.

Those thoughts, luckily, weren’t in my framework.  But in 2001, as I was in the midst divorce devastation, I went to a lecture by life coach, Cheryl Richardson.  She spoke eloquently about daily journaling.  Since my spiritual journey was deepening (that’s what divorce can do for you), I decided to really commit and try it.

I had some points of focus.  First, there was my spiritual coach, Irene, who kept giving me assignments like, write 101 “shoulds” in your life.  Then it was 101 desires, she said when I stopped “shoulding” all over myself, I could actually choose a life I desired!

She also gave me deep questions to write about my marriage.  I began to see how I had chosen my marriage mate, given my childhood in an alcoholic family.  I kept pondering the question, “How did I get myself into this mess?” Writing it all down was like unraveling a mystery.

Then there were the spiritual self-help books that she and my friend, Carrie, recommended.  These two weren’t fooling around.  These were not fluffy books. “Seat of the Soul” by Gary Zukav hit me between the eyes.  I would read a passage, it would trigger something that I had not seen before in myself, and I would be compelled to write.

An interesting thing started to emerge, besides tracing the trauma.  As I shared these epistles with Irene, she said, “You’re a writer.”  I had not known that.  As a little girl, I kept writing Dr. Seuss-like poems and my mom said, “One day you will be a writer.”  I didn’t buy it.  Writing rhymes was for kids.  No adult would do that.

Eventually, I discovered that both of them were right.   But that’s for a later blog.

Journaling became a huge part of my spiritual practice.  It revealed so much to me as I scribbled, uncensored, on those unlined pages.  I dumped my life on those pages, my tears, my joys, my desires.

It helped transform my life.  It is why I work with it all the time in my coaching practice.

Something to play with:

Shop for a journal, something that excites you to actually open the page, preferably with no lines so that you can scream through your scribble!   

Get a pen with ink that you love, then so for it.




bio2Karen Fitzgerald is a personal development coach and entrepreneur whose mission is to help guide top performing creative women make big changes in their life.  She is also a sought after public speaker, writer and performer and has written for the Huffington Post and has spoken at The Hay House.


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2 Responses to “What Do You Want? (Part 2)”
  1. pam says:

    colored pens work wonders! 🙂

  2. Mary Lynne Johnson says:

    I am grateful for your words, Karen. I have been avoiding my journals…yes, journals, lately.
    You have inspired me to begin again.

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