I Dare You To Dance!

Ballroom Dancing

Hay House was astonished! Actually, so was I. Why would 868 people sign up for my debut webinar, “Dancing With Desire”? And then, why would 500 of them actually tune in (60%)? Hay House told me that probably only 10 – 20% would. It confounded the company. It confounded me.

Was it my charm, my charisma, my hip-hop haiku song which they had me put on You Tube? Nope. The listeners didn’t really know anything about me, but they tuned in anyway. Why?

In these weeks that have followed, I solved the mystery (or I like to think so:)!  In the wonderful coaching calls I’ve had with listeners from around the world, I asked them, “What drew you to listen?” Every one of them answered, “I used to dance.”

Some had done salsa, some swing. There were people who had done African dance, sacred dance, and belly dancing.   One had always wanted to try ballet. But here’s what caught me…NONE of them were dancing now and THEY ALL WANTED TO!!!

This metaphor of dancing with desire continues to intrigue me, not because of actual footwork but because how we dance around those desires.

This is why I coach, why I am fierce for people living joyful lives, living the lives they truly want to live.

So, continuing these conversations, I didn’t tell them to tap dance. As I explored with questions, it became clear that they had put their own desires aside to serve other people – parents, siblings, jobs, you name it. Although none of these factors were actually stopping them, they were stopping themselves.

Oye! I want to shake women up. Some men do this too, but with women, it’s an epidemic. Forget the flu, forget ebola, this codependency crap has got to go! This is what will kill your spirit faster than anything, denying those dreams that are burning inside.   Our light goes out and we become depressed, angry, or jealous. We want what they’re having. And we resent not having ours.

But we don’t give ourselves permission. We feel guilty or unworthy or not allowed.

So this week, I want you to get selfish. As you write your desire list, pick one thing you want to do.

Keep it simple. Choose a movie you want to go see. Don’t wait for somebody else, if they’re bogging you down. Do it alone and savor your freedom.


Take a big leap: Book a vacation that you’ve wanted but felt too guilty.   Guilt is on its way out.


Dare I say it…GO DANCING!!!

Drop me a line.  Tell me how it goes.



bio2Karen Fitzgerald is a personal development coach and entrepreneur whose mission is to help guide top performing creative women make big changes in their life.  She is also a sought after public speaker, writer and performer and has written for the Huffington Post and has spoken at Hay House.


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