What Do You Want? (Part 1 of 3)

karen red dressThis is first in a series of three episodes. Stay tuned!

Twelve years ago, in the midst of my divorce, my brilliant spiritual coach, Irene, asked me that question in the title. She was moving me toward my future, although I didn’t know that then.

So when she queried me, I believe my very cogent response was, “Huh?”

Two weeks prior, she asked for a list of all 101 “shoulds” in my life…I should be a good wife, good daughter, good mom, school volunteer, run a soup kitchen, work part time, have a successful theatre career…
That list was easy. I was as exhausted from writing it as I had been living it. Afterwards she said, ”You’ve lived your life taking care of others. Your kids are grown, you marriage is over. Now it’s about you. Go home. Get quiet. Then ask your soul, “What do you want?”

That list was harder. I didn’t know. I thought some brainstorming might be in order, so I asked my neighbor the same question. She burst into tears. Nobody had ever asked her that before. Me neither. Where to begin? In my journal I entered, “I want to belly dance.” What? Then another emerged, “I want romantic candles lighting my whole house.” Then a red dress showed up on the list.

This was odd, all these sensuous desires, or maybe not. I had existed in a 25 year empty marriage that was lonely and rejecting at every level. I hadn’t experienced an ounce of romance or sensuality. Everything had eventually shut down.

As I continued my assignment, though, other things started showing up. “I want to inspire women.” “I want to help change the world. I want to know my purpose. I want to know God.” Really? I would know the divine in a red dress and belly dancing? Ah yes, but more on that in later blogs!

I had no idea where this was going, but my intuition started to kick in. The guidance became very clear, and 2 years later, without any real estate agent, an apartment dropped in my lap in New York City and I began a whole new life, so big, so free and more creative than anything I could imagine.

These many years later, my purpose has become much clear – to inspire women into their dreams, their creativity, their own sensuality, their own greatness. That’s why I coach.

So my suggestion? Play with the question! What do you want?

One Response to “What Do You Want? (Part 1 of 3)”
  1. Nancy M. says:

    Karen, it’s so wonderful you are writing these blogs….good for you! I’m staying tuned. xx

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